So this post is going to be a little bit a personal ramble, you've been forewarned.
It's been about two month since I started my new job as a barista at The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. Don't get me wrong, the job is great, my boss is great, and my co-workers are great. But as each day goes by I can't help but to face the facts. I'm twenty-nine years old. I work at a job that in all honesty is going ultimately lead to no where, and my financial situation isn't getting any better. To make a long story short, I've spent the last week or so helping my mom with bankruptcy paperwork that stems from my parents separating. It's all a real complicated situation that in all honesty, I shouldn't be worrying about but yet I have to in case the shit overflows, if you catch my drift.
Anyways, back to the job. It's a decent job. I can't complain too much except for a few points. I feel that in the four or five hours I work each day, I work my ass off. There was/is a lot to learn and I'm honestly am still trying to grasp it all. I'm trying my best not to screw up too badly, and some days are better than others. My shift supervisors keep telling me that I'm doing a good job considering my expedited training but I can't help to shake the feeling that they may be not telling me everything. I dunno, maybe it's all in my head. Still though, that fact that I'm turning thirty I should be doing something in my life. Something meaningful. I feel behind, I feel like a missed a step and here I am saying I'm trying to plan for the future when it feels like my future is getting shorter and shorter.
I feel stuck.
Below average job, no girlfriend, hell not even any friends around here. It's hard to get motivated to do anything. I have so many problems that I need to figure out for myself and yet I feel like I need to take on everyone else's problems as well.
I'm not sure how long I'm going to last. I don't know what to do about it.
As for the title of this post? The Future? How do I get there?
I would very much like to go back to school, even if it's a trade school. I'm good with computers, I enjoy working with computers. I plan to focus on that. But I'm not really sure how to take that step anymore. It would have been so easy for an eighteen year old kid, fresh out of school. It's a little harder now.
I need a second income, but I can't really work a second job right now. For the last few months, I've been thinking about taking my gaming to online streaming. It could be a source of revenue, but that only takes off if I get a lot of viewers. Also, I had thought about, and tried my hand a little about writing articles for various websites. As of right now I check my Yahoo! Contributor Network account and have amassed a grand total of one cent for 4 page views. I see some promise here, but I need to find a little more time.
I guess I'm just a work in progress. The ball has slowly started rolling. My first goal was to acquire a job, because living off of unemployment sucks. That's done. Now to rebuild my life again.
It's been about two month since I started my new job as a barista at The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. Don't get me wrong, the job is great, my boss is great, and my co-workers are great. But as each day goes by I can't help but to face the facts. I'm twenty-nine years old. I work at a job that in all honesty is going ultimately lead to no where, and my financial situation isn't getting any better. To make a long story short, I've spent the last week or so helping my mom with bankruptcy paperwork that stems from my parents separating. It's all a real complicated situation that in all honesty, I shouldn't be worrying about but yet I have to in case the shit overflows, if you catch my drift.
Anyways, back to the job. It's a decent job. I can't complain too much except for a few points. I feel that in the four or five hours I work each day, I work my ass off. There was/is a lot to learn and I'm honestly am still trying to grasp it all. I'm trying my best not to screw up too badly, and some days are better than others. My shift supervisors keep telling me that I'm doing a good job considering my expedited training but I can't help to shake the feeling that they may be not telling me everything. I dunno, maybe it's all in my head. Still though, that fact that I'm turning thirty I should be doing something in my life. Something meaningful. I feel behind, I feel like a missed a step and here I am saying I'm trying to plan for the future when it feels like my future is getting shorter and shorter.
I feel stuck.
Below average job, no girlfriend, hell not even any friends around here. It's hard to get motivated to do anything. I have so many problems that I need to figure out for myself and yet I feel like I need to take on everyone else's problems as well.
I'm not sure how long I'm going to last. I don't know what to do about it.
As for the title of this post? The Future? How do I get there?
I would very much like to go back to school, even if it's a trade school. I'm good with computers, I enjoy working with computers. I plan to focus on that. But I'm not really sure how to take that step anymore. It would have been so easy for an eighteen year old kid, fresh out of school. It's a little harder now.
I need a second income, but I can't really work a second job right now. For the last few months, I've been thinking about taking my gaming to online streaming. It could be a source of revenue, but that only takes off if I get a lot of viewers. Also, I had thought about, and tried my hand a little about writing articles for various websites. As of right now I check my Yahoo! Contributor Network account and have amassed a grand total of one cent for 4 page views. I see some promise here, but I need to find a little more time.
I guess I'm just a work in progress. The ball has slowly started rolling. My first goal was to acquire a job, because living off of unemployment sucks. That's done. Now to rebuild my life again.
